It’s ALL about Patsy…

Pats

My name is Eurydice Colette Clytemnestra Dido Bathsheba Rabelais Patricia Cocteau Stone, but I prefer Patsy or Pats. I’m an editor at a top fashion magazine in London, but I hardly ever do any work, once a month I show up to the meetings for the free champagne and cast my eye briefly over next month’s issue.

I was born in Paris – well, to be correct, my mother didn’t give birth, she had something removed – and don’t think for one second I’m going to reveal my age (somewhere between 27 and 42, whatever age bracket is “in” at the moment).  I’ve lived an exciting lifestyle; I was a model in the 70s, alongside Janice Dickinson (she might have been the first supermodel, but I taught her everything she knows and got her into Studio 54 then stole Jagger off her!).

I spent a bit of time as a man in the late Seventies, but “it” fell off after a while. I haven’t eaten a thing since 1973 after undergoing a stomach bypass, but I allow myself a morsel of turkey at Christmas (you have to treat yourself don’t you?) My best friend is Edina Monsoon, head of a (pretty unsuccessful) PR firm. We spend most of our time round hers quaffing champagne or at Harvey Nicks checking out the latest from Christian Lacroix’s line. I love my fags, my booze and my beehive, and most of all – sneering at the misfortunes of celebrities.

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One Response to “It’s ALL about Patsy…”

  1. 🙂

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